YF&A #1
From Journey to the Abyss: The Diaries of Count Harry Kessler 1880-1918 by Harry Kessler, Edited. Laird Easton (New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 2011), pp. 828 (ePub edition):
Evidently he and I have different interior rhythms, and so the waves of our feelings interrupt and clash with each other. He too had a typical experience with me that drives him crazy each time. He can’t formulate it in general terms but can only give examples.
Over the past week or so, I've been engrossed in the second season of Young, Famous, and African (YFA) on Netflix, watching an episode per day (ish). My interest in the show was sparked by friends who pointed out a resemblance between me and Swanky Jerry. Despite having watched the first season a year ago, I still couldn't see the resemblance. But my friends pointed out our similar vocal tones, hand gestures, subtle eye rolls, and even the way we both sit cross-legged. Who knows eh! What I do know is that some types of TV shows are considered more valuable or important than others. Reality TV, in particular, is often seen as less important compared to other genres, and it is placed at the bottom rung of this hierarchy. There's a certain contempt reserved for those who watch YFA or other reality TV shows. But this judgment is made by a specific group of people who use it to signal their class or status. That status can either be their education or money. The amusing aspect of it all is that the show's rankings speak for themselves, as it secured a spot among the top 10 most-watched shows on Netflix in South Africa last week. So, who are these mysterious viewers? I roll my eyes when people make excuses for watching reality TV by labelling that kind of content as "trash TV" or "mindless entertainment." I often advise them not to apologise for finding delight in the things that they enjoy. This newsletter is an attempt to reassess that hierarchy for myself and who knows, maybe others might find that useful. So, one week I might write about a song, while the next week I might delve into the world of pornography. These products are not made by aliens, they are part of our shared culture and deserve thoughtful consideration. Anyway, I still don’t see the resemblance with Swanky but there’s something that I find particularly thrilling about him: his disregard for weather, activity, or location. He will show up flamboyantly nonetheless. Perhaps I could use some of that flamboyance, not clothes wise but maybe with my outputs 🫣
Interestingly enough, the show was a hard watch but not for the obvious reasons. Most of the members in the show are hyper-competent in starting, riding, and sustaining conflict. And as you may know conflict is an essential ingredient in drama. Without conflict, there is no drama. What is also interesting to watch is how they provoke each other up just to get a reaction. They seem unable to escape from each other's traps and that was also too painful to watch. I generally try to investigate the things that give me discomfort when I watch a film or a TV show. I often ask: why does that make me feel so uncomfortable. I personally avoid conflicts as much as I can but when I am in conflict mode I am quite comfortable in it. Although I have to first get past the inertia of deciding if I want to engage or not. In the show however, there was never a single moment of rest. The pot was boiling 24/7. Balls were constantly in the air and I think that exhausted me in a way to watch. Another thing was how they consistently embarrassed one another. For someone like me who feels second hand embarrassment for the characters who are about to go through a terrible or embarrassing moment, it was torture. I cringed before and during each and every embarrassing event on the show. Even though I know that it is scripted, scenes like this takes a mental toll nonetheless. The pace of the conflicts was so quick that I had to watch an episode a day before they give a fellow a heart attack. Here’s the kicker: on the 6th day, I got used to the pacing and watched three episodes in a row. I began to enjoy it. Just like Louis, I staggered for a bit, and then got in with the show’s rhythms. If anything, the show has highlighted areas I need to work on in my personal life. I have a need to clearly define my conflict resolution strategies to myself and also understand why I find embarrassing or shameful scenes so challenging to watch. 🤦🏽♂️
The show did an great job of showcasing the beauty of South Africa. It broke away from the typical stereotypes that the rest of the world often associates with Africa — The usual images of flies on a child's face. Instead, this show focuses on young-ish people who are thriving and doing interesting things, which brings me great joy. In the second season, they have included people from other parts of Africa. It’s Young, Famous, & African after all so the show must reflect that. Fantana from Ghana and Louis from Namibia brought their own flavour to the show. Bonang made an appearance but signed out of the show just when it was about to get interesting. If there's one phrase that I absolutely detest, it would be "baby daddy" and "baby mama." What exactly does that mean? On the surface, "mother of my child" and "baby mama" may appear to have the same meaning, but there is a subtle distinction between the two. I guess every generation has to come up with words to describe their own experiences. That's the only explanation that makes sense to me. Perhaps one day, I will need to investigate why the phrase doesn't sit well with me. However, that day is not today. Why did I bring this up? Andile has children with two women. I don’t know if it’s just me, but these women look so alike. It was hard to tell them apart. Does he have a type? I don't think so, considering he attempted to date Zari. Or was he just trying to throw us off? I'll go ahead and assume that people would have noticed the resemblance between his two former partners. Is there one person who rocked your world so hard that you are looking for them in everyone else? Does this explain why Kanye West’s latest partners kinda look like Kim? Another thing I enjoyed about the show is the rationale each character gave behind some of their actions. It’s so much fun trying to decipher each character’s values and belief systems. The show is wet dream for sociologists, anthropologists, psychologists, and many more. I see fragments of each of them within myself, and that is definitely something I am eager to explore further. 🌞
Thanks for reading. If there's anything you'd like to chat about, or if you have any questions, feel free to shoot me an email. I'd love to hear from you. :)